When I decided to fully stand for Christ and vocalize our relationship I knew that there would be pushback. What I didn’t anticipate is that it would happen as soon as it did. Being under 30 and openly saved is a very interesting experience. Even more, being within youthful circles with people who may believe in God but not have a relationship is even more challenging. What do you do? Do you scale back your boldness to take a stand? Do you openly express hesitations and decisions to live differently? Do you sit silently and allow them to infiltrate your mind with their ideologies?
Yet, I noticed that no matter what, it would be a matter of time before I would feel empty again.
I once entertained each of these thoughts at some point or another. In the earlier parts of my faith I reasoned with sin. I danced within arms reach of destruction. I sang with the shadows of the dark and found momentary comfort in its embrace. Yet, I noticed that no matter what, it would be a matter of time before I would feel empty again.
Taking a stand to live holy is scary honestly. You might have feelings that you’re missing out on fun. Maybe you might think that you’re wasting your youth and have plenty of time to get it together. Or, you may feel as if people are judging you.
If I said that those things didn’t cross my mind or become my reality at one point or another I would be lying. However, there came a point in my life where I had to make a decision. It seemed as if my life depended on it. Maybe my future and the way I would live after I made the decision were at stake. While I’m not sure which, it was certain that I felt a sense of urgency to decide.
I chose him! I chose to live for God the best way I knew how. I chose to immerse myself in the bible and not try to reason with my own intellect. I decided to be an outcast and embrace the outsider status I always had. I allowed others to cast judgment on me while they secretly admired my tenacity. I walked to the beat of my own drum and it felt weird. So many times as a child I sought to fit in with the cool kids. Ultimately, they were cool because they weren’t me.
It wasn’t until I realized that I was squatting to fit in with them as opposed to challenging to stand and join the ranks with me. Choosing to stand for any cause can seem like standing in quicksand. However, choosing not to is a quicker way to die. Because I chose to stand out among the crowd, yes I get ridiculed but I go home at night knowing that I did what was required of me. I stand knowing that at the end of the day I didn’t compromise my core beliefs.
I chose him! I chose to live for God the best way I knew how.
Contrary to popular belief looking odd or standing out isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It is a signal. One that invites joy, attention, criticism, and jealousy. However, riddle me this, what is the alternative?